May 15 2018

We Asked 16 Facebook Moms for Their Advice, and Here's What They Shared

By Meta Careers
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This Mother's Day, we celebrate the amazing contributions of mothers everywhere. Here at Facebook, we aspire to be one of the best companies for families. The people who work here and their families matter and are an important part of our community.
We asked 16 Facebook moms on their experiences and advice, and here's what they shared.

Aiko, Product Marketing Manager, Japan

I celebrated Mother's Day... with a surprise party from my family. It still feels strange to have celebrated this special day as a first-time mom!
My greatest challenge professionally... has been my management of time. Before motherhood, I had lots of flexibility - both at work and at home. Now, my husband and I have to take care of ourselves and a very active baby! From feeding him and changing diapers, to bathing him, and putting him to sleep - these additional responsibilities have not only taught me to ruthlessly prioritize my limited working hours, but to also completely unplug after work in order to spend quality time with my son.
At work... my manager and colleagues have been very understanding of my situation. It has been three months since I've returned to work, and they've encouraged me to adjust my working hours and location as needed. Having the feeling that you are being supported by your team no matter what has definitely helped me to deliver the greatest impact as both a mom and a career woman.
My advice to working moms... is to take it easy! When I first returned to work, I felt like I wanted to achieve so much and be valuable to my team. However, there were lots of unexpected events that happened, and things that didn't go as planned, so at times, it became very stressful for me. On reflection, it would be a healthier choice for new moms to take it easy from the start and ease into their new work situations and lifestyles.

Alexandra, Head of Marketing, ANZ

I celebrated Mother's Day... by reflecting on how grateful I am for my mom and her incredible support, and how blessed I am to be parenting my two babes. On this special day, my mom and I took a walk by the beach, with takeaway coffees in hand, together with Archie and Xanthe (aged seven and 20 months).
My greatest challenge professionally... has been letting go of perfection. There’s no such thing as perfect. As a single, working mom, it’s been a challenge to meet the energy levels required for parenting, both before and after work, on my own. Figuring out the support system required to sustain a challenging and rewarding career has been my biggest challenge, but it was well worth it! With a magical combination of active, involved grandparents, a nanny (who is one of many angels in my life), an excellent daycare centre, and lots of outsourcing of domestic things, I'm a single mum who's lucky to be well-supported.
Part of my support system... is my family at work. What enables the Facebook culture of work-life flexibility and autonomy around how you do your work is the distinctively strong focus on impact. People here are rewarded for the impact they've made in their work and not on the hours they've worked. This ownership on how to integrate your work and life creates space for someone like me to find time for pilates, my friends, and other things I love - which means a happier, healthier, and more wholly fulfilled “me”.
My advice to working moms... is to be purposeful and accountable for the way you spend your time. Visualizing what I want to achieve at the beginning of each year has made a monumental difference to my performance both in and outside of work. Every December, I'll think about the year ahead and write a vision where every commitment I make (professional or personal) will have a KPI attached to it. For example, I budget the number of work nights I'll have away from my kids each month, and the number of family holidays I want to take each year. It sounds finickity but it works!

Sarita, International Recruiting Director, APAC

I celebrated Mother's Day... My daughter and son both love to draw and make cards. My daughter is just learning to write, and she made me a card this year that said "I love you mama." Nothing can beat reading that!
My greatest challenge professionally... has been battling with the “guilty working mom” syndrome - the feeling that I’m not doing enough at work, or not doing enough for my family. We often are our worst critics, and I actively work on not being so hard on myself and knowing that I’m giving my best. I can't say that I have overcome it yet, but am working on it!
The work-life flexibility at Facebook... has allowed me to design the life that works best for both creating impact at work, while still prioritizing what is most important at home. This freedom and support to design what works for me individually, and to flex that as my family's needs evolves really allows me to be my best.
My advice to working moms... Be 100% present, in whichever moment you’re in – either at home or work. When I first became a mom, I really struggled with being fully present at home. I was constantly on my phone or computer at home, and then I finally realized that I was missing important moments. Be present.

Dipti, Client Partner, India

I celebrated Mother's Day... by hosting a brunch gathering with my friends and their kids at my place. In the evening, I had dinner with family and enjoyed a special celebration at home as I'm a new mom.
My greatest challenge professionally... is striking the balance between work and family time. My baby is four months old, and I'll resume work in two months, so getting that balance is imperative. I plan to have dedicated hours to my baby with no screen time to ensure that all the physical and emotional attention he'll need is well taken care of. These hours will be well defined between myself, my husband and the extended family.
Going back to work as a new mom... will be easy because I'm confident that I'll have the support and encouragement at work to deliver the biggest impact. When I was expecting and before I went on maternity leave, my peers and managers at Facebook were encouraging me to devote enough time and care to my health and baby.
My advice to working moms... The roles that we play as mom and career woman are just like the different parts of our bodies - they cannot be neglected and need nurturing to stay healthy. It's important that we learn to bring the best of ourselves to work, and carry none of the work stress back to our family. Hence, in whatever that you do, give your 100% in doing it.

Nobuko, Sales Learning Leader, APAC

I celebrated Mother's Day... by visiting my mom, where we celebrated this special day together with my baby daughter!
My greatest challenge professionally... has been dealing with unpredictable situations such as my baby deciding to wake up every hour of the night or falling sick suddenly. As such, I'm often sleep deprived, or have to move my meetings and business trips. I've shared my challenges with my colleagues, and they've been very understanding and supportive. I now have plans B and C prepared so that I have backup solutions in case my original plan fails.
Since I've become a mom... I've been able to plan my work around my baby. Facebook's flexible working culture has allowed me to start work early in order to leave earlier to pick up my baby from her nursery, feed her, put her to sleep, and then continue working from home. While my working schedule has changed, I can still get my work done and I'm grateful for the flexibility that we have in the company.
My advice to working moms... Instead of stressing over things that you cannot control, take this as a learning opportunity to be more creative and flexible as this mindset shift will help you to better deal with challenges at home and work. One of Facebook's core values is to be open, so being open and communicative with your colleagues and manager will help you to navigate through any initial challenges.

Christine, Director of Marketplace Partnerships, APAC

I celebrated Mother's Day... at my son's pre-school Mother's Day event, where he and his classmates, under their teachers' supervision, cooked strawberry pancakes for their moms. We finished the celebration with a nice craft work that my son made and presented to me. It's great to have his school organizing this yearly, and a truly rewarding way for my four-year-old to celebrate with me! I totally look forward to these sessions every year, and I'm thankful that I'm one of the few parents who were able to make time to be present at these weekday events!
My greatest challenge professionally... has been to feel fulfilled to do the work that I'm passionate about, while being present and committed as a mother. I love my work, but it requires me to travel a fair bit. To ensure that I do not compromise too much on time with my kids, I plan my flights via overnight routes, which allows me to optimise my time at home. With this arrangement, I'm able to spend time with my kids, and do things like putting them to bed before I head out, and reaching home by the break of dawn on my return day so that they can see me before they head out to school. This means sleeping on the plane a lot, but this sacrifice is absolutely worthwhile when I see the joy on my children’s faces when they wake up to seeing me at home in the morning.
The flexibility and support I get at Facebook... from my leaders, peers and teams has been amazing in providing me with the ability to do the work I love while carving out time to be with my kids. When I first received my employment letter from Facebook, I was pleasantly surprised by how the clause on operating hours was kept open-ended - “We are open 24/7 so please discuss with your leader on what works best.” It's hard to believe, but at Facebook it’s not about putting in the hours, but about the impact that you make at work. This has helped me to be a lot more efficient with how I spend my time at work and being present with my children. For instance, twice weekly, I leave work at 3pm to bring my son to his extra curriculum classes, where I continue to work remotely, or engage in thinking time while he is in class. The culture of work-life flexibility has empowered me to plan my time around my children, instead of them around me!
My advice to working moms... Do not forget to pamper yourself. As mothers, we wear multiple hats, and we often fall into the trap of managing and juggling too many things at the same time. At the core of work and family is our well-being, and if we're not deliberate in thinking for and taking care of ourselves, we can get overwhelmed by the day-to-day hustle. I believe that it's important to establish some level of equilibrium across work, family and self so that we can feel contented and happy both at home and at work.

Divya, Program Manager, Accounting, India

I celebrated Mother's Day... by spending time with my mom, mother-in-law and my son. I'm so lucky to receive love from two bold and beautiful mothers!
My greatest challenge professionally... has always been to be able to contribute 100% at work, while being there for my son when he needs me the most. Looking back, there have been times when I had to prioritize work over creating beautiful memories with him. I'm able to cope with this challenge because of my family's support - my family members totally understand my situation, they assure me and take great care of my little champ. I'm not certain I'd be able to be as productive at work if I did not have this support system in place.
Returning to work from maternity leave... was not easy, but at the same time, I was very passionate about my career. Fortunately, Facebook's culture is amazing, and I was never under pressure to be at the office, as long as I could manage my deliverables. This flexibility went a long way in helping me to focus on impact at work without having to worry about home commitments.
My advice to working moms... The fact that we have been the motivation for our kids to achieve their initial milestones of crawling, talking and walking, should affirm our faith in ourselves to go for that extra mile at work while managing personal committments with equal grace and poise. As long as we don’t see our personal and professional lives being two separate entities; and the more we keep things simple; enjoy each moment; help our kids to grow into responsible adults; and make our kids cherish each day - this is worth any effort we make, and will only reap joy and happiness.

Naomi, Director of Brand, ANZ

I celebrated Mother's Day... with a small gift from each of my three kids. They choose them from a stall at school, and I love that they hand-pick the gifts themselves. This year, I got a pen, a heart-shaped tin and AC/DC aftershave.
My greatest challenge professionally... In my experience, it’s no one great challenge, but lots of smaller things that sometimes make it difficult to maintain the momentum in my career. Numerous challenges like leaving for and returning from maternity leave; getting out of the office at the same time every day to be home in time for the family; being stuck without childcare - I overcome them (sometimes) by having an excellent support network that includes my husband, my sister and a great babysitter.
Flexible working environments... are great, but companies should do it for the men in their organizations too, and make these practices mainstream! We should make flexible working completely normal and acceptable to both parents. I love working for Facebook as it embraces this philosophy.
My advice to working moms... Don't feel guilty about outsourcing and accepting help!

Winnie, Agency Partner, Greater China

I celebrated Mother's Day... by spending quality time with my mom and daughter. Since having my daughter, I appreciate my mom more than ever, especially the sacrifices that she's done for me and my family.
My greatest challenge professionally... has been time management and having the energy to be fully present for my family after work. As a practice, I often map out my lunch to use the time to run errands. I leverage technology to my advantage; such as having notes from my phone synced to my work laptop, and blocking out time on my phone calendar to execute tasks. Most importantly, I've learned to delegate and accept any help I can get, and let go of things that aren't perfect.
Facebook’s work-life flexibility... allows me to have a great work-life integration. Our offices have mother facilities, so I can continue with my nursing journey while at work. I'm also able to work on a flexible calendar so that I can do the best work while balancing my day with personal activities. As my husband is the primary care-taker, and we do not engage in external help and so having work-life flexibility helps me to perform at my best both as a mom and a career woman.
My advice to working moms... is to prioritize. It sounds cliché, but pick your battles, and find ways to be efficient at home and at work. Prioritize your happiness and well-being by saying no to things that don’t matter, and learning to let go when things aren’t perfect.

Swetha, Quality Operations Manager, APAC

I celebrated Mother's Day... at home with my kids and mother who is in Singapore helping me settle down. We had brunch together, attended church and spent some quality time at the playground. I love that my mother enjoys her time with my kids, and that’s my definition of celebrating Mother’s Day, giving joy to my mother, and also enjoying time with my kids.
My greatest challenge professionally... was balancing work and life, to be able to spend quality time with my kids, be involved in their growth and development, and be there for their fun and challenging times. It was hard at first, but what was key for me was identifying that it is a challenge, asking for help and depending on God for my daily strength. It also helped me to understand and accept what trade off’s I’m willing to make to balance both worlds.
Work-life flexibility... is not just written on the walls or portals - it is real and supported by everyone on the team and management,and you are pushed to find ways to make this work for you. There's no ready-to-use solution or recommendation, which is great. Based on my needs and situation, I schedule my meetings, assign deadlines and take a share of the projects. This has allowed me to prioritize ruthlessly, and to be able to bring impact in my work.
My advice to working moms... Ask for help and never say no to help! Be open about your challenges and build a support system. As much as you are a Super Woman, you cannot do it alone!

Hannah, Vertical Measurement Lead, ANZ

I celebrated Mother's Day... by having a nice dream about sleeping in till 7:00 a.m., but in reality, I was woken up at 5:40 a.m. by my one and three-year-olds. I cuddled my kids in bed for maybe 20 seconds before the ‘I’m hungry’ announcements began on repeat. I then shared my breakfast with two other mouths because breakfast always tastes better from mommy's bowl. I then spent the rest of the morning with my kids and extended family at the local park, drinking coffee and eating croissants. In the evening, my husband prepared a roast for dinner while my kids drew, colored, played, danced and sang around the house, burning the last bits of their energy before bedtime. What a day!
My greatest challenge professionally... has been setting realistic expectations for myself and communicating them. This has meant setting and sticking to priorities at work more rigorously than before. I prioritize by what’s relevant to my role, what creates value for the business, and if I do engage in side projects, it’ll be what I’m passionate about and what excites me. It also means being strict with my time, and questioning the value and relevance of everything I work on to stay focused and on point. I’m also incredibly lucky to work with many moms and dads who understand and respect my time.
Facebook has... outstanding tools, resources and tech support that allow me to work at my full capacity from any location. For me that means leaving the office on time to get home and spend quality time with my kids before their bedtime, and then jumping back online once they're asleep to close out anything from the day and to prepare for the next day.
My advice to working moms... I live by the mantra - ‘don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today’ - and I apply this personally and professionally. Don’t leave daycare bags to pack in the morning; and don’t leave an email unanswered if you can respond on the same day. 12 hours is a long time, and a lot can be done overnight when you work for a global company.

Annie, Head of Marketing, Greater China

I celebrated Mother's Day... by having quality time with my husband, daughters and mom. We spent the day at the outdoor playground, had dinner together and the highlight if the day was receiving my daughters' handmade cards.
My greatest challenge professionally... has been managing my time, and keeping my energy up after work for my family. I've accepted that I can't be a perfect mom during work and I can't be a perfect employee at home. Hence, what I do now is to start my work day as early as 5:30 a.m. to send my daughters to school. I'll use the limited travel time that we have to chat and connect with them, before dropping them off and heading to office. At work, I stay focused, prioritize and continuously explore ways to improve my work efficiency. After work, it's 100% quality time with my family - no phone and no work.
I feel really grateful... that Facebook offers work-life flexibility. There are occasions when I need to take care of family committments like my kids’ school activities, and I have the flexibility to plan my schedule around them. I can also work remotely from home when necessary. I really appreciate the trust that the company gives to us by empowering us to find ways where we can deliver the biggest impact.
My advice to working moms... You have 100% control on what you think is important to you, and the decision is yours to make. Accept that nothing is perfect, and just say to yourself; “ you are doing great”. Stay focused and enjoy every moment, no matter at work or with your family. Life is precious.

Ritika, University Recruiter, APAC

I celebrated Mother's Day... by dedicating all my time to my baby! No calls, no emails – pure, exclusive bonding time.
My greatest challenge professionally... has been striking a balance between my baby and work, and managing the expectations of people around me. What worked out for me was figuring out my ‘baby time’ and ‘work time’. Once I had set my schedule and communicated it to my colleagues, it got easier to manage work without compromising on my time with my baby. As a working mom, it’s been challenging to come to terms with the fact that I'll miss some precious moments with my baby, but knowing that there are so many more memories for us to make together makes it better.
At work... I have complete flexibility to chalk out a schedule that works best for my job and baby. This has helped me to deliver impact as I can always choose what things to prioritize on, and this allows me to focus on the right things at the right time. I’m so grateful to be working for a company that encourages me to put my family first.
My advice to working moms... is to not be afraid of being judged. There will always be someone out there who will send you on a guilt trip for not choosing to be a stay-at-home mom. Remember, it’s a choice that you make that you need to live with. You don’t have to struggle to prove that you’re a superwoman. It’s okay to ask for help and share responsibilities. I work because it gives me a strong sense of self-worth, and I've always believed that kids with working moms grow into more confident, independent and adaptable individuals. That’s exactly what I want my daughter to be when she grows up.

Carolyn, Head of Agency, ANZ

I celebrated Mother's Day... by participating in the Mothers Day Classic Walk for Breast Cancer with my family, followed by lunch with some friends. It's a tradition that we always observe on this special day.
My greatest challenge professionally... I was appointed MD of my previous company, and within two months I realized I was pregnant. I only took a short amount of time off, but the support I received from my management team made it possible for me to maintain the role and feel confident in coming back without missing a beat.
Facebook's work-life flexibility... has helped me to schedule my work around my son. Since he has started school, it's nice to know that if there's something important to him, I can schedule my day around it. My husband and I both have pretty demanding careers, so we've always relied on outside help in order to keep the train on the tracks!
My advice to working moms... Don’t sweat the small stuff! There's always going to be something that is missed out, and you shouldn't beat yourself up for it - just try to get to the next thing. My son is very proud of what I do, and I'm pleased that I can be a role model to him. These are the things that matter.

Lydia, Recruiter, Greater China

I celebrated Mother's Day... by having a nice dinner with my mom and my mother-in-law together with my two daughters, and sharing with them on how grateful I am to have them around.
My greatest challenge professionally... has always been maintaining a good balance between work and family. I'm so lucky to be in a company that provides flexible working hours, and be part of a team where everyone is supportive. It has helped me to spend quality time with my family.
Being a working mom... has forced me to improve on my multi-tasking skills and set a positive example to my kids even though they are too young to understand big words like “mission” and “vision”. I believe they can feel how committed and passionate about my work.
My advice to working moms... Planning is key to time management! Get organized and block your family hours on your calendar as it will help you to find the right balance between work and family. Last but not least, block some private time for yourselves, a little rest goes a long way.

Medha, Strategic Partner Development, India

I celebrated Mother's Day... by spending this special day with my daughter and cherishing the time with her. I also planned a small surprise for my mother and mother-in-law, in appreciation for all the things they've done for me. Now that I'm a mom, I can understand and appreciate all the hard work that goes into motherhood.
My greatest challenge professionally... It's an eternal 'battle' between what takes priority - like attending an important work call versus calming my kid in the midst of her meltdown. Having a support system - which is my spouse and extended family - and getting external help to share the responsibility goes a long way in managing these situations.
I joined Facebook... when my daughter was two years old. My previous organisation was extremely generous in providing work-life flexibility, and when the offer to join Facebook materialised, I was in two minds. At that time, the foremost thought in my mind was - “Will this role offer the same flexibility as I have now?” Looking back, I'm so glad that I've taken that plunge! Not only am I working on what I'm passionate about, but Facebook's culture of work-life flexibility, which includes allowing employees to work from home when needed (kids do fall sick a lot) is amazing . There are no questions asked as long as my work gets done well.
My advice to working moms... One mantra that I keep repeating to my myself lately is ‘done is better than perfect’. My home might not look like a scene from "Better Homes and Gardens", nor is my food like Nigella’s and I've made peace with that!

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